"Out alone tonight. Very weird to be single again. Txting blog frm phone, sad."
I texted that from my phone last night, DIRECTLY to my blog! Wild!Of course, I couldn't capture EXACTLY what I wanted to say in such abbreviated words, but it was more a test than anything else. I ended up being with my wonderful pal, Liberation, of Trigger Magazine, and, of course, my lil Italian, Fabio, and then Joe, James, and a few other really nice pals,... so I wasn't "ALONE," so to speak. I have all day to grieve and feel sad about my loss of Carlos, so to go take my mind off of it occassionally is really helpful.
Plus, now we know txt msging frm fone wrks!
YAY!
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2 comments:
Can you tell us the reason he left you?
Rather than speculate and analyze Carlos too much, I just hope for a day when his reasons become clearer to him and he reopens his heart to himself, me, and our relationship.
Carlos is using the protection of Fear to make his choices right now. He wants to protect me from his rejection by removing himself from my life, and he wants to protect himself from feeling by removing me from his life.
When people want to fall back asleep, they will do anything to rid themselves of what disturbed them into consciousness.
I prefer to think that Carlos has hit SNOOZE. When he's ready, maybe he will wake up and we will share life again in some way.
For now, I am just a bunch of noise to him.
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